Monday, March 1

life goes on

my gastric has gotten better.
my portions have been cut down like 50%.
i dun eat alot now. *sadness i miss food*
i take my meds.
hopefully it'll all be over soon.

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life working has started to sinking in.
it becomes overwhelming sometimes.
yet sometimes it'd be rather mundane & routine.
Z says he's thinking of doing an internship or try to get a job in creative.
i'm excited. he finally came back. i hope he does gets it.
Life back to crafting. Thats the juice of it all, where the excitement is.
*secretly laughs* i guess life at samsung is getting rather boring huh?

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henry has gone back to Melbourne.
:(
idiot refuse to let me know what time he'll be flying.
so that i cant go send him off.
sigh.
there goes a few more months/yrs of not seeing him.
he damn jaga me, sumtimes almost like my brother.
eventho i lecture him more.
after so many years, we've been goin round n round n round in circles.
and finally here.
after so many yrs, we'd look back and say "wow, thats alot".
thank god u were there.
all the best in Melb brrraaaddeeerrr....

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jack, gosh... its been so long.
when i heard the news i was concern.

i know how much she meant to you.
i honestly did not want u to go thru 2005 again.
perhaps, it really does take heartache to find ur frends.
if we didn't broke up, neither of us could have been the person we are now.
i dare say we learn smthg from each other, least i've learnt to be a better person becoz of u.
and eventho we're no longer together it doesnt mean that we no longer care.
i've witnessed u changed.
i've witnessed u grow.

from the bottom of my heart.
i'm proud of where u are now and wat u have achieved.
stay strong over there.
it's her lost for not appreciating.
trust me.

------------------------------
speaking of heartaches...
sigh.
i'm in a mess right now when it comes to relationships.
gosh. *smacks!!*
i wish i can smack myself awake.

sometimes i do feel like i'm a selfish person.
i need closure, i need assurance and i need confirmation.
i always want to know, if its gonna work.
if its not gonna work or i'm nt sure if its gonna work, i'd rather not start anything at all.

why go thru so much when ur not even sure if it'll be smthg u want?
isis says that love should not need that much of rationalizing.
i dunno. maybe i do think so much.

i'm quite comfortable at where i am now.
so how?

-----------------------------------
as i've told myself and so many other people.
relationships should be the least of my worries.
i'm 22. wheres the rush? if it comes it will. if not, i'm doing fine as well.

as promised, i need to spend this time mapping my life.
doing what i need to do now.
my family, my work & *new addition* my health. yikes!

at certain points of life...
it gets lonely.
i miss having someone around.
i miss getting hugs.
i miss roadtrips and makan trips with the cartoonz.
i miss singing and chit chatting with temple frens.

i need to re-organize.


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