:: was it meant to be? :: part x :: the finale ::

-----

to make this last post less confusing.... the orange ones are for scott... the green

ones are for callie... and the black ones are the narrator...

-----

he sat there tday. jus waiting. din noe wat he was waiting for. jus sat there
waiting. it was a normal day of work for scott, he gets up in the morn, bathed,
changed... grabbed breakfast n rushed to work. it was suppose to be a normal
day too, he would've jus finish work. go home. have dinner. n go out again for
his 2nd job. (yea...he worked double jobs... wats a high school drop out suppose
to do?). he worked in a shop in the mall. normal 9-5 job. he was frankly doin
pretty well for himself lately. *smugs*

it was a slow day, not much customers. so he sat there. waiting. staring at
the crowd outside the glass window as they passed by without looking inside.
it was a boring day. doodling on a sheet of paper at his desk. thinking of lunch.
hey! its 12.30pm okay?! spare me tat look!

he looked up from his place, and a familiar face passed by. whaaa...? he stood
up. stared at the person who jus passed the entrance of the shop. could it be?
and she turned her head to look in. it is her!! they're eyes met... for tat few
seconds scott tot he would've jus rushed out. but the crowed outside was busy,
and she continued walking. wait!!!

"hey, i'll just step out for a few minute k? smthg to do." scott hastily told his
partner of the day.
"sure... dun be too late k?" but b4 he could finish. scott dashed out of the shop.
searching for that face in the midst of the crowd. he couldn't find her!! where
is she?! he took out his phone.... amy...bonnie... bobby... callie... callie!!! he
called.

-----

betty wanted to buy her prom dress. and callie offered to bring her around
town to find the perfect bargain. they went from shops to boutiques to malls.
one by one. the whole day... it was tiring. and they were running out of places
to go. betty was... hmmm... thin!! and petite! to find her a dress was like
dressing up an ant!! kinda dramatic but yea... tats the situation! finally
callie remembered a mall in the other corner of town. she use to go there. but
her family went there lesser as malls were popping up everywhere.

they parked and callie was surprised at the amount of ppl there. no offence
but the mall was not as "happening" anymore! its more like an "auntie's
bargain house" now... and perhaps because of that, the crowd on that day
was like a HUGE "auntie convention". they were everywhere!!! betty
n callie struggled thru the crowd. finding gaps and a tiny way to move ahead
of the stampeding aunties.

in the midst of not getting separated, finding their way out and trying not
to suffocate, callie saw smthg... or sumone.... could it be? she tries to get
a better look. stretching her neck, cursing tat she wasnt 4inches taller.
it was him!! she tried to stand there and wave or smthg... but whoa... the
aunties were pushing like elephants... it was madness... so she continued
walking. probably din see me anyways.. doesnt matter... so they walked
along. buthen the phone rang.

-----

"pig head!!!" scott screamed into his cell. he din cared wat the world was
thinking.
"haha... hey... doneed so loud la... ur jus a few metres away." she chuckled.
the familiar voice replied. scott grinned. she remembered.

i let her go one too many times. not this time. i'm never gonna let u go
again. not this time.

"aahahha... it was you. i tot i saw yet another auntie... hehe... where r u?
stand stil will ya? i go find u!"

as scott walked towards her. it was all messed up. he couldnt stop
smiling. but he still dunno wat to say. wat can i say to her? its been
so long....

he stood there. staring at her. he wasnt even listening clearly as callie
introduced her small friend standing beside her. he jus stood there.
all he could thinking about was looking at her. staring at her. capturing
her every movement. her every expression. her smile, her dimple,
her twinkling eyes. why the hell did i ever let u go?!!! dumbarse!

she hugged him. he melted. speechless. he held her in his arms. so tightly.
afraid tat if he hadnt she would've disappear. in the middle of the crowd
they hugged. it felt as though the whole world disappear. it was jus them.

its been so long... but it still felt the same. the way u look at me. the way
you smile. even ur hair smelled the same. the way u blushed when i
stare at u for too long. but i cant help it. i just cant. i wanted to tell u tat
i love u. tat i've been waiting soooooo long. tat all i wanted was for u
to be be mine. i wanted to tell u tat i've changed, i'm a better man now.
trust me. i am. i wanted to tell the world tat i am the luckiest man
alive. i wanted to tell them tat u are mine......

-----

hearing his voice brings back so many memories. callie jus stood there.
looking at him as he walked towards her. bad boy scott. in slacks and
glasses. and a collared shirt. he's different. i'm glad. he's nt lost after
all.

staring at him. it all came back. the smiles, the tears. the memories.
the past. all that she's been cleverly avoiding. it all came back.she
couldnt avoid it any longer. he was standing there. lovingly jus staring
at her.wat could she do? she couldnt make up her mind... not
until the very last minute.

she ran into his arms. and he held her tight. she could hear his heart
beat as it thumped in his chest. she could feel her legs shaking as she
felt his warmth. she couldn't bear it any longer. another minute in
his arms and she would've break. she would've jus break down n
cry. torn apart. confused.

after they hugged. callie slowly let go of scott's shoulders. taking deep
breaths, she tries to calm her emotions. fighting very hard for the
tears to not show. but scott din let go. he released her from his arms.
but he held on to her hands. he wanted to say smthg.oh god...
please dun.... not now..... please...

"callie....."
"no... scott stop. not now..... please...."
"but why? "
"just dont."
"if nt now den when?"
"2 years ago... at the carpark."
"callie.... dont...please...."
"i'm with some one now..........sorry....."

-----
no one knew wat happened to scott nor callie. maybe they did end up
together. mayb they din.

ppl always asked. y did he wait so long? some ppl say tat callie still
loved him as she did. some said she jus din wanna risk being hurt
again. while others said tat she jus got tired of waiting.

so the question is... y did they waited so long? wat were they waiting for?
the perfect timing? or the perfect person? the perfect moment?

waiting for a 2nd chance? or jus waiting for the one and only? if it is so?
den how would u ever be sure n certain if TAT was the perfect moment?
how would u ever be sure tat it was the Perfect Person?

ppl use to say tat love was trying with the right person at the right timing.
was it true? mayb scott could've been the one. mayb callie jus gt sick of
being hurt. mayb it wasnt meant to be at all?

so.... was it? or was it not?

waiting for the right person.... whose hands fit exactly into urs. waiting for
the right timing.... where the stars allign and the wind was kind. waiting
for the right moment.... where u'll blush, and the whole world disappear.
how long do u plan to wait?

wat makes ur so certain tat there would'nt be a better fit? wat makes u so
certain tat it was the right moment? so does tat mean u'll have to wait
forever?

waiting for smthg to happen in the future.... y not jus embrace the present?
what if there's a better person out there for us? question is... wats wrong
with the person u r with now? "i'll tell her when the timing is right." y cant
u tell her now? wat if.... tml smthg bad happens to u? wat if tml she wouldnt
feel the same anymore?

its ironic. isnt it? how we always hoped for a better alternative? how we wait
for the perfect one. sumtimes we're jus too obsessed waiting for the future,
to appreciate wat we have in the present.

translated lyrics- how many times can love rekindle
itself?

always blaming myself for wat i did tat day,
i'll always regret letting u go the other day.
y is it tat we love each other,
but in the end we still end up being apart?
who would've tot tat i would see u again tday?
in the midst of so many ppl.
all these year... i've lived on.
couldnt tell u if it was good or bad...
but it jus felt like...a part of me was missing.
but i soon felt tat, u still cared for me after all these time.
how many times can love rekindle itself?
yet how many ppl are willing to wait?
after learning to appreciate everything,
how sure are u tat the love u had is still there?
so tell me.
how many times can love rekindle itself?
and how many ppl is worth waiting?
when the love u have is already dying,
how many of u still have the courage to love again?


:: 3niGma ::

:: was it meant to be? :: part ix ::

callie quit sunday classes. she stopped mingling wit tat group of frens.
she did everything possible to avoid remembering him. she avoided the
outings. she avoided the gatherings. she avoided the parties. everything.
i dun wanna see him. i dun wanna talk to him. i dun wanna have
anything to do with him. i wan him to be forgotten.

callie wished tat she had the ability to wipe her mind clean of scott.
everything he ever did. every single heartfelt moment wit him. she
just wished tat she could turn back time n change everything. she
wished she never knew him.

she stared her new life. a scott-less life. a new year, a new start, a
new environment, a new aim, a new guy, a new purpose, a new life.
she moved on...

could this be real? had she really done so well for herself? if it is, den
y does her mind still creeps around at night? if she really did moved on,
y is she still thinking of him occasionally? how is he? where is he? if
she did moved on, den y is she stil so tempted to send him a msg once
in a while? -hey, how r ya?- -i noe life's been tough on u.- -hang on
okay?- she hesitated. in the end, some weren't sent to him. but sum did.
and if callie did moved on as she claimed she did, she wouldnt be waiting
by her phone everytime she sent a msg, she wouldnt be mad if he din
reply. he's forgotten. well, at least sumone is moving on. how could he?
and she wouldnt squirm n twist in delight if he did. he replied! mayb he
did rmb....

but as time goes by, callie grew along. and very slowly...very very
slowly... scott wasnt so important anymore. yes, she would still grin
foolishly if she were to have heard any news from him. but very
slowly, it din matter if he din either. days passed, weeks went, months
flew.... soon its been years since the last time callie met scott. she
was happy. happy? erm.... how bout "contented"? yes... she was
contented wit her life.

life was well. exams were okay, school was fine, she did put on abit
weight (hehehe), but it aint all tat bad, jude was being well...
jude.. he's sweet, he's nice, he's smart. in case ur wondering... yea...
jude's the new guy. he's sweet n he's nice. he's well mannered and he's
polite. he's sensible and he's rational. he's patient and he's all around
great. but he's not him.

but y think of him still? y in the world is scott still an issue? i havent
talked to him in ages. he doesnt matter anymore. he shudnt matter
anymore. but he feels like the right one! but how long am i suppose to
wait? waiting for him is impossible. its disappointing and hurtful. so is
he worth the torment? is he worth waiting? how can u still find the
courage to love each other when the love u have is already dying?
mayb it's fate. mayb its destiny. or mayb....he's just not worth it...?



the finale is up nex...
:part x:
so.... was it really meant to be?

:3niGma:

:: was it meant to be? :: part viii ::

its over....
she's gone....
i blew it.....
coward....
damned....

callie left the church classes soon after. guess i did end up ditching her.
she din come back. left. gone. naaah...maybe its for the better anyway...
like she'll actually end up wit me?! although he did wished it would've... but
it din...

lost.....

time flies. months gone by without her by my side. scott din call callie. he
din even attempt to find her back. she's better off. it doesnt means tat callie
was forgotten. he thought about her constantly. she was always in his head.
how she always stroke the back of his head when she comes up from behind
him. how her secondary school skirts are flare and they'll fly up like an
umbrella if the winds too strong. how she'd smile at his lame jokes. how
she accepted him as he was when the whole world din...

all i wanted to say was tat i missed u so badly. i love u. i really did. but i
was afraid. afraid tat i would've hurt u. afraid tat being me, i would'nt
appreciate u. afraid tat i would screw up the only good thing tats happened
to me. now i know. there are some feelings between us. neither of us have
ever really told each other. and we shall always remain the best of frens.
but the only one who knows how i really feel is myself. wat would happen if
i told u?

i love u....
i wanna hold u in my arms...
i wanna be the one u would turn to when ur troubled...
i wanna be the one to comfort u n support u....
that....
i wanna be with u....

lying in bed. all scott could think about was how much he regreted wat
he said. all he could think about was how much he wanted to be a part of
callie's life.

if it was meant to be.... things would've been different. if it was meant
to be... they would end up being where they are right now. if it was
meant to be...... they wouldn't be hurting.... yet... if it wasnt meant to be
... y does he miss her so much? it if wasnt meant to be... y izzit tat he felt
tat she misses him too? if it wasnt meant to be.... y is it feeling so right?!!!

he took out the pictures.... every single one. she looks the same. we look
so right.... the vibe was gud... then how can this be wrong when it feels so
right? he ran his fingers thru every faces in the photos. reminicing the
past. how we use to smile like all we need in this whole wide world was each
other. mayb it was wat we needed all along... we were jus too coward to admit
it... i was jus too coward to admit it.

give me two years... i jus need to pick up my life. get everything right. jus
give me two years... and i'll come back. a new man. me at this point. i have no
rights to have u. i dun even dare to say tat i deserve u. jus two years.

jus TWO more years...


part ix....
the end is coming near....

:: was it meant to be? :: part vii ::

              --- callie,
                    do take care of yourself coz i no longer can.
                            wishing you best of luck in your future, scott.--- 
     there it was, a note, sitting right at her table in class. sitting right on
top of it was gastric tablets. he knew. tears began streaming down her
cheeks. he cared. her fingers were trembling and her vision was blurred.
she clentched the note tightly. y din he come? why?

     i wanted to tell u so many things. how much i missed u and our long
talks. i noe it wasnt meant to be as we are from different worlds. i noe
it may be too much for me to ask for more den jus frens. i wanted to tell
you tat i stil cared as i did and it'll never change. boyfriends were pushy
and touchy. they were jerks and they din giv a damn accept how to get
into my pants. but u din. i miss you. i go out there hopefull and i failed. i
couldn't find friendship or relationship with the innocence and trust we
had. if we had such chemistry, why isnt it meant to be?!! WHY?!

     heartbroken at dissapointed at the world. callie was depressed. was it
really meant to be? they are totally different ppl with totally different
personalities.she was from a world where the most important thing at
tat moment was scoring in exams and being a prefect. while scott grew up
learning to watch his back whenever he's walking. he grew up carrying a
knife in his pocket and a stick stashed in his car. when callie was worried
bout proms and dates, scott was dodging cops. then again, how can they 
be so close to each other emotionally when in reality they are worlds
apart?!

-.-.-.-.-.-
     everytime she sees scott bandaged, she knew. must be the
fights. how it hurts her to noe. she worried day n night, she prayed so
hard tat he would be fine. for years, even after scott left the mafia. he 
was still "involved" some way.
     "must u go?" callie would ask. hoping tat he would say no.
     "i gotta do this. he's my friend." scott would say. it seemed so
"matter-of-fact". but it is not! 
     "i tot u quit?!" callie was desperate. she din wan him to go. she
noes wats ahead. he'll come back hurt, bleeding... she could bear it.
she was concerned. wat if something bad happen?! wat if he got 
hurt?! please dun go... please... she looked up at scott. silently
begging tat he could stay. somehow scott did understand. he hugged
her tightly.
     "i wun get hurt okay? i promised. i jus gotta do tis. please
understand." scott smiled. and he left. he din come back in one piece.
but tat sin stop callie from worrying and pacing around her room
everytime scott pick up a call.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-
 
     there was once scott din appear for sunday class. it was weird as
he always came. callie became curious but she din asked. becoz it
was getting awkward between dem. stuck in between. soon the 
teacher came in.
     "where's scott? skip class a?" the teacher asked. callie listened
tentively hoping to know wat did happen to him.
     "he's in the hosp." scott's sis answered. the teacher was shocked.
so was callie. wat?! why?! wat happen?! so many question began
popping in her mind.
     "wat happen o? is he okay?" some students asked.
     "he's alright. he was pretty banged up. motorcycle accident." the
class gasped. they were discussing it. everyone. everyone but callie.
she was speechless. she din know was to do. she was stoned. wat
happen?! is he alright? pretty banged up?! wats tat suppose to
mean?! oh god... please let him be alright....

    after class she quickly went home. she tried asking her parents if
she could go visit. but her parents were reluctant. growing up as she
did. she abide. she din argue. she jus went back into her room. held 
a pillow in her face and started  to cry. why? she din know. the tears
 jus came. out of fear... out of concerned... out of worries... perhaps... 
out of love? she din wan him to be hurt. she weeped n weeped. she
wished she could be there. at least jus to know how was he. but she
couldn't. all i wanted to be was by ur side.

     for the nex weeks, scott still din showed up. callie was worried. he
was banged up. its been 2weeks. wats wrong?! everyday she would 
linger around her hse phone. she would pick up her phone and dial tat 
familiar number. i'll  jus call  and ask how is he. tat all. but when
someone picked up the phone. she paniked. wat if he din wanna see
me? she hung up. 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

     it weird what we have. ppl tell me i deserve better. mayb i do.
which wan do i deserve more? a man with great results, nice family
background, steady life yet with no sparks? or a man tat i cared for
and i still tink he cares for me too? so wat if he doesnt study and he
use to smoke? so wat if he was involved with the mafia? screw dem.
screw it all. wat if all i wanted was him all along? other boyfriends
din work out. i ended up comparing him wit dem. how we can click
and i couldn't wit dem. how he understood me without me saying
a word and they din get me if i drew dem a clear picture.

     in around a month, scott did come back. slightly battered up, with 
a bandage  around his chest. yet he still smiled at her. he still managed 
to melt her heart every single time. tats it. i'm gonna ask him. end 
this confusion.

     "gald to see ur fine." scott turned around. he smiled. he seemed glad.
     "hey you.... tot u were talking to me anymore... hehe.." scott replied.
chuckled abit.
     "u tot i wasnt talking to u anymore so u drove ur bike up the roof?!" 
scott looked shocked at callie's reply. den he laughed.
     "guessed the whole world knows huh?" they laughed. den there was
this awkward silence.
    "hey, can we talk? " callie asked.
    "sure... of course. wat u have in mind? " scott followed callie up to the
curb.
    "we can talk bout anything right? i dunno how to ask this. so i'm jus
gonna ask u straight."
    "erm... yea... sure..."
    "do u like me? i mean "like me" like me...? i keep sensing tat u care. so
do u?" callie was looking at him. straight in his eyes. hoping tat it was true.
tat all this torment was worth it. it was real....
    "......... urm... callie, how shud i put this... i do care for u... i really do. but
tats all.... it not wat u think. really... sorry...." he smiled. and he left.

      callie jus stood there. she jus stood there. she couldnt feel her legs. she
held on to the nearest wall. she leaned on it. she slided down to the floor.

      sorry.....?

part viii....
still want more?

 

:: was it meant to be? :: part vi ::

     i don't understand. why am i stil thinking about u? i cant help it! i cant....
i try to forget u... but i dont hav the heart to... 

     everyday he sat there, every single day. waiting for her. scott dropped out 
of school not long after the accident. he wasnt the "studious material" anyway.
but tat did not stop him from thinking about her. he waited in a car right
outside of school. every single day. jus to catch a glimpse of her. just when she
stepped out of school, he'll duck right below the dashboard and he'll reappear
after a few seconds. thats scott. he din want to have anything more to do wit
her. he jus wanted to see her. how is she? she's thinner. exams this year,
must be the pressure. dun give up carrie. u'll manage. i noe u will. theres so
much that he wanted to tell carrie. but no. i'm not gonna reappear in her life
n screw it up again. it wasnt meant to be.

     after a few months, scott started to take up some odd jobs. saloons, phone
shop... stuff like that. the scott tat was out there in the society,
"philandering" would be the best word to describe him. every day, every
few weeks, different gurls were by his side. mayb he changed... naah. mayb
he forgotten callie. mayb its an failed attempt to forget her. mayb he is a
jerk and he'll always be. mayb... i dunno...  he doesnt care anymore. be it
gurls. or girlfrens. or even sex. it doesnt matter to him.

     i heard she's dating some guy in her school now. apparently he doesnt
really give shit bout her. tat son of a... why am i so mad? its obvious she
moved on. its eve obvious so did i. so wat if i dun care bout dem? rebecca
or nicole or connie? truth? i cant remember their name. but at least i'm
trying..... am i? den wat about her?

     scott's confused. night after night he'll worry. everytime rumours spread
to him. he'll worry even more. is he treating her right? wat are his intentions?
why am i worried? she's none of my business anymore... whatever she does,
it no longer has anything to do with me. how her hair short now. its none of
my business. how she looked weird with spiked hair. its none of my business.
how she fool around with jerks and bastards rite outside school. its no longer
any of my business. caught in between. misunderstood. scott din know wat to
do. he misses callie but he knows tat the damage he had done is beyond repair.
he couldn't turn to anyone. no one understood. everyone tot he was a bastard
for doin wat he did. okay... mayb i was!

     but callie never did. she never judged me. some how...some way... she
understood. no matter how messed up the situation was. she never gave up
on scott. n scott knew tat.

     she never judged me. not when i was smoking. not when i was being
childish. not when i dropped out. neither when i was switching gurls like
shirts. she din like it. but she din judge me. its always weird how she
ends up picking up his mixed up signals and his silents cries for help. she's
always been there.

        and i let her go..... one too many times.

     he picked up the phone. but he din call callie. instead it was amanda he
called.
     "hello?"
     "hey amanda? scott here."
     "oh, you... why?"she's being hostile as usual.she never liked me.
     "erm... have u seen carrie lately?"
     "erm.... carrie? y?" she sounded weird. wats wrong?
     "amanda? u there? wats wrong??" scott paniked. please dun. please...
dear god.
     "urm.... she's right here. we're at the hospital. she had stomach ulcers."
 shit... no... gastric?! no... please...
    "scott? u there? scott....? scott?!!"

    there was no reply. he ran. he took his car keys, and he rushed out the
door.

    "nurse, my fren...callie... stomach ulcer..." scott was panting and he couldn't
catch his breath. he paniked.
    "room 2107 sir."
    
    he dashed off as fast as he could. wats wrong wit her? must have skipped
meals again! i told her never to do tat!! why wont she listen?! she never
listen!! he reached the room. room 2107. right before he open the door. he
checked his reflection on the window of the room. she shudnt worry bout me.
do i look ok? ok.... no more panting.. no yelling. casual... i dowanna pressure
her. then jus as he was checking the room. he saw. a guy right beside her bed.
holding her hand.

     scott backed off. he left.

part vii....
comin up.



     





 

:: was it meant to be? :: part v ::

      ever since scott went wit debbie, callie sort of started to kick scott 
out of her life. she try not to talk to him, she din wan anything to do wit
him. scott is goin to be gone from her life once n for all... n her heart too.
     "hey, y u guys not so close edi wan?" ppl use to ask.
     "y shud we be? haihyah, ppl gt gf d... dowan interfere lo..." callie would
answer casually,carefully covering the tracks of her bleeding heart. he lied
to me. he played me a fool. i tot there was smthg. turns out to be jus a
 fragment of my imagination. he lead me on.
     "haiyah, jealouse izzit? dun la... not meant to be la!" amanda would always
say that. yup. not meant to be. never was. he's a jock, i'm a ... forget it!

     since scott moved on, i would be an idiot if i waited for him. i shud try
to get my mind of the bloody betraying bastard. but it wasnt easy, not with
scott's popularity n definitely not with debbie rubbing it in her face every
chance she can get.
     "hey, did u see scottie anywhere?" debbie would run up to callie n ask.
wtf? scottie?
     "urm... no." callie would give her the shortest answer in her brain. she
avoided them any chance she can get.
     "haiyoooh... that boy a.. so hard to find him... yunno la... his things all
with me... wanna find him oso hard..." debbie would say with her oh-so-
*excuse me* -bitching tone. callie heard enough, she jus glared at her,
wishing deep down tat she could jus pull all her hair off her head! debbie 
soon knew that she was barking the wrong tree and would back off....

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

     forgeting scott was easier said den done. he was everywhere. he was
there when callie finished school, he was there during church. and the
worst part was the fact that scott still treated callie the same.
     "hey..." callie's heart skipped a beat. she turned around in shock at the
fimiliar voice behind. scott? she peeped behind his shoulder, no sight of
debbie.
     "watcha doin here without debbie?she might throw a fit jus seeing us
 talk." callie would always try to answer scott calm n collected, ignoring
the fact that her heart was thumping  fast and the fact that scott was
staring at her so closely. okay... all i need to do is jus end this conversation
a.s.a.p!
     "naaah...she's alright. i came to see you. u alright? haven't seen u much
recently." scott reached out his hand trying to hold callie's shoulder but she
backed off. scott looked abit dissapointed. but his dissapointment was far
far faaar different from wat callie was feeling. please dun touch me. i'm 
afraid. any more of this torment and i'll jus run into  your arms and cry. 
how could u do this to me? u lead me on, u made me believed in the
imposibble. den u left me out to die. what do u expect from me now?
     "dun liddat la.." callie said while trying to hold back her tears. "later debbie
sees u... u'll get in trouble." witout waiting for scott's reply, she jus pushed
away his hand and walked off. she couldnt stop her tears. she hated herself
for still feeling the same way. WHY?!
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
     wat really did the trick? callie was walking along the building one day, and
she saw debbie dragging scott's hand as they walked behind the block. she
waited for a while n she waited awhile longer. she couldnt help it. she walked
behind. yes, she followed dem. and there they were.... .... .... .... .... .... ....
his hands were locked with hers... she was in his arms... it was unbearable....
a kiss.... her hands were wrapped around his shoulders as her right hand
slided up to his neck....thats it! she snapped.
     
     callie never remembered crying that much or that hysterically before.
all she knew was, this is the last time she's shedding a tear for him. so she went
home. days and nights went by as she weeped the nights aways. wat was a
lovestruck 14 year old to do? she cried. n she cried. she cried till her eyes were
puffy and she could cry no more. thats it... scott is never gonna get near my heart
again.


part vi... coming up.
i noe callie's story is abit slow compared to scott's.
patience my dear readers....


     

:: was it meant to be? :: part iv

     "oiiii!!! siao kia!!! wake up lo!!! wat u staring at la?!"
     "huh?! wha...?" scott's been day dreaming again... sitting on his chair staring
into blank space while an image of her passed by right in front of his face...
could this be it? for some strange reason, i couldn't get her out of my mind...
scott was obsessed about callie. he even had 12 pages of his history note book
filled with callie's name... every line..  and he has the note book now to prove
it too!

    "RRRIIINNNGGGGG!!!!!!" thats the bell, for the pupils of the private school,
its their 2nd recess. but for scott,its the time where the public school behind
theirs just finished their classes. and he would dash to the fences n try to look
for that fimiliar face. waiting n waiting... there she is... her hair looks longer....
she looks kinda cute with her hair at that lenght... she's wearing her baju
kurung tday...hope it doesnt rain...some times she would have extra classes...
den scott will jus go back into class looking like he was hit by a bus or smthg.

     should i jus go and ask her? i cant get her out of my mind... not since
camp... i miss her...  i really feel for her... worst thing is, i tink she feels it
too...

     every since camp, scott n callie where closer den ever! right after camp,
when scott was on the way home. the phone rang. he half thought and wished
that it was callie. but when the caller id flashed "debbie", he jus stared at it
thinking SHIT!!. he's been avoiding her calls for ages. she annoying... debbie
was the gurl that would call in the middle of the night to "just say hi".. and
the gurl who would call for no reason watsoever and ask "soooo...wat u
doin?"

     but this time, scott picked up the call.
     "wat u wan?"  dear god, please make it quick.
     "scottie, must u be so hostile?"  urgh, i hate it when she calls me scottie.
     "am not bein hostile gurl. wat u wan?"
     "i missed you. i saw u in camp. but u were too bz flirting wit sum other
chick to care bout me huh?"  whoa, she saw? shit! she's a blabber mouth!
     "uh.. really? uhm.. naaah... i treat every  gurl the same..."
     "riite. so u make everyones supper too huh? r u trying to make me
jealouse here?" u and ur ultra super ego.
     "naah.. of course not. wat make s u thinks such funny things?"
silently, scott wipes off his sweat.
     "scottie... dun lie to me.. i know her. her name is callie. and she's from
mattherson high school, which is right behind urs." deep shit!
     "really?! ehehe... urm... i din noe tat u guys close?"
     "close enuff to knoe that u dun stand a chance by her. she's a straight a
student. top of her class. she's a prefect with a sparkling clean disciplin
record. while you, my dear scottie, u hav nvr passed basic engliah to save
your life. u spend more time in the principles office den class. u whack ppl
like u need to do that to  stay alive." okay, tats harsh... but... mayb she's
right... she wouldn't....
     "hey, must to drop me tat hard? I AM NOT crushing on tat gurl okay?
carrie or callie watever her name is!" scott was raising his voice. he did not
wanna admit tat he was hurt and that it sucks! he doesnt wanna noe how
gud callie is because he already knows tat. tats y i love her. neither does he
need to be reminded once again wat a jackass he is. tats it. its over.
no chance.
     "c'mon scottie. u and i both know where u belong." debbie was pushing it...
but she knows she's pressing on the right buttons. because scott said...
    "hey, yunno i dun like her like her... c'mon.. she's a nerd. jus look at her.
pink frameless... looks like she's from mars..." the heated argument turned
into a heated conversation and den it became a "mating ritual".and it all
ended with......
    "so....who do u like?"
    "hehhe... you? "

     shit! wat the hell was i getting my self into?!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

      days passed and scott called callie lesser n lesser... callie was starting to
ignore scott. and scott knew exactly y. he din even bother to explain. it better
this way.... she could go better den me.

     and for a while, callie wasnt an issue. altho scott never seen her wit other
guys. nor rumours about a boyfriend or not. she jus wasnt that close anymore.
and it was better for scott that way. it makes it easier to forget about her. her
smile. her rough frizzy hair tat always smelled like apples. the ticking of her
red swatch, den her blue white striped one, later it was her green n blue
swatch. how she always tie her shoelace left to right. and how she always
tuck both side of her hair behind her ear but right side always falls out...
shit! who m i kidding!!??

    but debbie made it a point to make sure that callie wasnt an issue. she was
glued to scott 24 hours a day 7days a week. any dickhead could see that their
relationship was mainly staying over and a whole lot of rough-housing in
between the bed sheets.  but she din mind. so scott din too.

     but after 97 days, they broke up. debbie was since den m.i.a. and scott din
care. he had enuf. hell yea i had enuff! its is crap!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

     scott was back n everyone could see that callie was happy. but nothing
happened. there was SOMETHING there between dem. but none of dem
could ever explain it. they were there for each other. if callie was in trouble,
jus one call and scott would rush there. if scott needed someone, he knows
tat callie was jus a call away. they comforted each other thru the years. the
rivalries, the tensions, the outside pressure, none of them could get to callie
n scott. for they know that they have each other. and they wont judge each
other...
but then again... if this wasnt love, wat is it? could this jus be pure friendship?
or is it something more?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

       nights n nights, scott stayed awake in his bed. screening thru the
pictures n the memories. wondering wat is it tat they have between dem...
love? friends? pity? admiration? wat was it?after 6 sleepless nights and
8 restless nights... on 25/11/2004, scott drive his friends car to find callie.
illegally, yes... so sue me! he drove passed a tuition centre, and  scott felt it
again.. he turned he's head to the left and he saw callie. she was wearing a
pair of green board shorts, witha black v-neck t-shirt. holding her blue winnie
the pooh file. her hair is long now, she tied it up. she looks abit chubbier tho..
cuter... and ... she was in the arms of another guy...

     suddenly scott changed his mind. he drove straight instead of turning. he
jus drove. she's with another guy now. his eyes were burning up. i'm not
gonna cry!! this is wat was meant to be. she shudn't settle wit a dipstick
like me... he din notice tat the car was goin faster n faster... callie...
mayb i shud giv up... we're not meant to be... we were never meant to be...
the car was speeding faster n faster... scott closed his eyes to stop the tears...
den there was this lorry, he couldn't find the brakes...mayb he din wanna find
the brakes. the stearing was shaking. and the car rammed into a lorry and
later ended upsidedown at the roundabout....

    he woke up on a hosp bed. i'm not gonna call callie. he was numb. he couldn't
feel the pain. mayb it was the painkillers or the morphine... watever it is,
it wasnt strong enuff... he couldn't find the pieces of his broken heart.



like it?! part v comin up!!!


    

:: was it meant to be? :: part iii

     "oi! carrot!!"
      callie turned around, and there he was... leaning against the building pillar.... 
poser... she walked up to him... 
     "anything you need SIR?" callie answered sarcastically... waddaya expect?
he's rich, he's cute, he has a whole line of gurls swooning over him.. he's a
plain jerk...
      "why you din come last week wan?" scott asked suddenly.
      "gotta go balik kampung last week. some lame family thing la. why? no one to
bully ey?" callie answered cautiously... why? did he missed me? i noe i did... 
but wat was i thinking? scott was a jock, they dun go for nerds u dumbo! at least
not when he has babes like debbie lying around at his expense...
      "ehehe... really? ahahha... carrot! tell me one thing in ur life tats not lame la!
carrot!" ish... why wouldn't the jerk stop teasing me?! he ignored my last question...
       "could u like stop being so cruel n mean?! i mean... its been nearly 2 years,
cant u go find a new victim?!" callie snaps back at scott.... frankly, they've been at 
it for nearly 2 years now... and they are practically inseparable...
       "dunno... u r fun to tease!" ohmygosh! is he hinting tat he likes me?! callie
was hoping for more... then the bell rang... great, just when it got interesting!
urgh!!!!
      "better go do your duty little miss hall monitor!" scott laughed... as jus as he
walk pass callie... "bytheway, yea.... i did miss you... jus a little bit...".... callie was
stunned... she was speechless!! oh my gosh!! did he jus...?! did we...?! is he...?!
ohmy gosh!!!
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

      no one could deny that signals were everywhere... hints were dropped
like nuclear bombs! the attraction was there... but no one made a move...
none... there were the winks...n the jokes... n the occational social hugs...
oh the hugss!!! plus the eye contact... callie could swear that scott was looking
at her all the time!! eventho it wasnt the "hey, i cant keep my eyes of you type"...
but whenever scott was busy doin smthg with some other gurls... he's always
busy with some other gurls... whoa, was tat jealousy? he would always steal a
glance at callie who would be sitting at a corner by her self.. and if she looks
back... scott would wink at her...

      ppl use to say that they were inseparable... if anyone were to separate them,
they'll end up moping like some love sick puppies... but of course, being only in
the 8th grade, they would of course deny everything....
     "me? naaah.... u think i would actually fall for HIM? he's a pig! a massive
one!" callie would be the 1st to defend her "dignity"...
    "ur calling ME a pig?! look in the mirror missy, i'm not the one that resemble
a carrot, pig!" and as usual scott would refute...
     "i am NOT a pig! you are!"
     "no... you are!"
     "na aaah, you are! you pig!!"
     "quit oiking! PIG!"
     "STOPPPPPP IT!!! YOU ARE BOTH PIGS!! HAPPY?! (points at callie) YOU
ARE THE HEAD!(points at scott) AND YOU ARE THE BUTT!! HAPPY?!
YOU GUYS GIVE ME A HEADACHE!!!" jake jumped in to rescue... ever since den,
callie was pig-head and scott was the pig-butt... not exactly "mr. macho's nick",
but it works for em..

     everyday, after school, callie would rush back home... quickly change n
gobble down her lunch... quickly did her homework n chores... and by around
4pm. she would sit patiently by the phone... okay, not exactly patiently... more like
 picking up  the phone and checking if the phone works every 15mins after 4pm...

      and when it rings... ohmygosh!! its HIIIIM!!!  ok ok... clam down now.... you
dowanna sound desperate... breath breath... ok ok...
     "hellooo?"
     "pig-head!!!" and callie would be grinning from ear to ear jus hearing his
voice...
     "calm down u pig-butt, no use screaming into my ear everytime...."
     and they would go on n on n on n on for hours... until either side of the parents
shouts n yells... she would be rolling on her bed, gigling at his lame jokes and
hearing about his day...and it is thru these long long long phone calls she
discovered y scott was the way he was... he's family, he's problems... even
scott has his fair share of issues too... how he wasnt always up to his dad's
expectations... how his mom always naggs at him.... how being the only son
was a burden for him... as he'll need to carry the family on his shoulders soon...
i guess i misjudged him... she also found out that scott was smoking.. ewwww!!!
major turn off!!! and he was in the mafia... and also that he wanted to
quit the mafia... scaaaary!!! and according to him... scott wans to quit the
whole mafia thing... and he found some one... is it me? callie would always
wonder whenever he talks about her... it sounds like me.... i think... scott could
go for hours n hours about this gurl... but callie always wondered who she was...

   "hey, i tink scottie like u,gurl! " amanda-callie's church best friend would
always taunt her...
     "naah, we're jus pals...." you really think so?!!! i think so too!!! oh my
gosh!! callie would lie innocently... secretly hoping that it was true..
     "naa~aaahh! he's so into you! anyone could see that you guys are throwing
signals EVERYWHERE!! " amanda and her realationship-know-it-all tone...
"ANDDDDD you like him too! " amanda stared eagerly at callie's reaction...
she blushed!
     "uh hah!!! caught red handed!!! dun deny!!! " there amanda goes... noseying
around .... callie blushed even more! she could possibly deny it any longer...
they've been playing the game for ages!!!
     "wat do you wan me to do?! u think i shud make the 1st move?! " callie
eagerly asking for a second opinion... wat if it was jus a mistake?! wat if i was
jus being over sensitive?! its SCOTT!!! he's not exactly the type that goes
for "carrot gurl" yunno...
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

      the turning point was a simple phone call...
     "hey, callie... do you erm... wanna go to this youth camp?"
     "youth camp? when wo...? whoa.. wait a min... did you jus call me by my
name?!"
     "(scott laughs) ...yea.... i was hoping you could come.. i'm kinda helping out
in it... it would be fun..."
     "hmm... okay... sure..."
     yea... the camp was fun... and callie grew more and more fond of scott...
he's been really sweet... offering her his jacket in colder nights... he would always
make her milo during supper time... she would help him to do abit of his work
since he was the youngest in the commitee member... in that camp, mayb he
was too tired, scott fainted after 3 sleepless nights... he fell right in the middle
of the kitchen floor....while being a pig, callie woke up to get her some milo, she
assumed scott was awake so she tried to call his cell... no answer.. where
could the bugger be?! ish... she tried it again... still no answer... so she gave
up, assuming that scott must have slacked off somewhere... just to find scott
lying there right at the floor... ohmygosh!! wat the?! scott?! she rushed to
his side...
     "scott?! hey...can u hear me?" scott was knocked out cold.. being
miss-know-it-all, she checked his pulse, he seemed fine.. breathing was
okay... mayb he jus worked himself out... so she sat there, luckily scott came
to his senses half hour later... luckily, cause callie was starting to lose the feeling
of her legs...
     "hey buddy, u alright?! can u hear me?" callie called out to him... " you
freaked me out there... u ok?" callie was relieved..."i thought u were dead..."
scott chuckled.. at least he can still laugh....
     "what will i do without u? " scott smiled.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

     after the camp... callie was convinced that it was meant to be.... it
couldn't be mixed signals...not with that smile... no! 2 weeks after the camp,
on 4th of january, 2003, callie mustered all that she had... n she walked
up to jake...
     "hey dufus, seen scott anywhere?" jake turned his head left den right....
you could see his eyeballs searching...
     "dunno, with debbie i guess...not that sure where they went tho... if you
know what i mean..." and jake winked at callie... what?! what was that
suppose to mean?! no... it couldn't be...
     "with debbie?!" naive and afraid, callie asked to reconfirm...please say
that it was a mistake...please...
     "yup! deb-bie.... they got together last week, right after camp... you
din know?!" at that point, the whole world came crumbling down... no... no...
 not debbie... its  not fair... no... i tot... i tot he likes me...  i thought...

    " i thought it was meant to be...."

this isn't the end yet... part iv coming right up!

:: was it meant to be? :: part ii

     "RIIIIIiiiiiiiiNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg!!" 
     "urgh" he hates sundays... why the hell must he wake up anyways?! it not like he's gonna
listen n be productive someday?! yeah rite...hell i am... daddy's yelling at him downstairs... 
fine... yet another reason to hate sundays... well, at least he can gooff off later.... scott's dad is
the head council of his church... which makes life even worst for him as he's EXPECTED to be the 
golden boy being all well behaved n polite and as he calls it "shits like that"....

     "walaueh! siao kia... tday so late?! wanna die a?" and jake-his partner in crime was already
waiting for him at the front door of the hall...  well, at least he turned up... ditched me last week... blardy asshole... scott jus grabbed his bag n they were off to the hall... "wey,
paiseh aa.... last week gt problem sikit a... so last week fun a?" jake teased sarcastically...
paiseh?!! tiu!! left me to rot in this dead place.... rite... jake brought his pokemons tat day...
(wat?! during that time it was the IN thing okay? almost like our PSP now...) well, at least
there was entertainment....

     well, as you've guessed it... scott wasnt a goodie two shoes, nor was he a golden boy... in
fact he tried in every way to go against everyone's expectation... he was a jerk, a rebel, a very
violent person... nothing more... at least till den...

     "hey, scott rite? i'm callie."

     jake stared blankly at the girl standing behind scott.... "shit, what did i do now?!!" he
turned and he recognised the face... "aaaaaa.... the short one... yea... i'm scott... wats it wit u?"
this gurl is smthg alright.... she is SOMETHING... "nothing... jus wanted to giv you 
back somthing..." she said plainly... as she started to fumbled in her super large black bag... 
wats it now? wonder what she got me?  wats in TAT bag?! a dead body? she's weird...

     "wat u wanna giv me wo? u din owe me anything oso?! i wouldn't mind is it was a kiss tho...
but knowing you... i doubt u can reach my lips..." scott taunted... n jake bursted out laughing
like mad... she frowned... n continued to fumble in her HUGE bag... she is something... but
what? she aint pretty... thats one thing... but she is something... jus couldnt work it out...
scott stared at the gurl standing in front of him... she had short hair... neatly tucked behind
her ears.. all the same lenght... kinda look like a mushroom... she wore glasses... PINK glasses...
comfirmed amah!! she was loud... hell yea... tested THAT last week... and she carried the lord of the rings around EVERYWHERE... comfirmed nerd!!!

    "wat is it gurl? ur not only short... ur slow too...!!" scott bend down to take a peek into 
her ever super HUGE black bag!... "wat do you keep in there? a dead corpse or smthg? huh?
whoa... so many....OW!!!!!" the "weird" gurl tugged his hair n pulled him all thw way down to
the floor! shit! bad move!! "THATS for whacking my head!" she stomps at scotts feet. "and
TATS for making me chase after you all over the place!!!" "HHMMPPHHH!!!" she strots off....

     "whoa... what the hell was that??" jake asked... trying to hide his amusement... the mighty scott, bullied by a nerd...  "dunno... new gurl...scary..." hehe...yet i am not mad... this is new...

     jake waited for scott's reply... "eh? not angry a? the last time a gurl did anything close to that... u slapped her!" 

     "naah...i pissed her off 1st... gosh wasnt she something...." i mean it...
     "uh huh... pretty hot headed if u asked me.... who is she?! "jake looked puzzled... so scott
took the liberty of explaining the arival of their new class mate... short n annoying... with
her white trackspants n a pure grey shirt... her blue sandals... pure nerd.. how she brought
her LOTR book everywhere n how she fiddles wit her pencil... even how her pink frameless 
specs would always slide down her flat nose...

     "whoa...dude!! u rmb that?! she aint pretty yunno... debbie looks better... waaaaay better..."
debbie was the leader of "scott's fan club"...along side with cheerleader rebbeca n steph n
lonnie n may n looooaaaddddsss more of other miss hot-sexy-brainless-prefect... so what was
this gurl? she is somthing... she aint pretty...(shit i said tat so many times! she's gonna kill me!)
she aint hot... like *droolz hot*... she is definately annoying... she's... she's....

     "wats her name again?" scott asked? "dunno...connie? carrie? something like that.." jake carelessly answered... "callie..." she looks like a carrot... hahah... carrot it is!

     "CARROT!!!!"
     "whaaaa.... its callie u dumb arse!!"
     "hahaha... i like carrot more....cuter wert!" she looks pretty cute when she's mad...
     "its CALLIE!!! urgh!!! dumb guys!!"
     "watever carrot.... i call em as i see em..." i tink her face is turning purple...
     "uuurrgghhHH!!! I DO NOT LOOK LIKE A CARROT K?!!!!"

     and off she goes...chasing after scott... and sometimes... scott will run a little slower...jus so
that callie could catch up... 


                  ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

      it was a typical day in school... scott was getting sick of class... so he walked out of it...(yes,
the teacher is still there) scotts get to do shits like that... and he always gets aways with it....
so yea... he was standing by the corridor of the 2nd floor of the tall private school he goes to....
thinking wat to do tnite... PS? naah...bored... mayb i'll follow tai lou go settle some stuff... yes,
he's actively in the mafia... hmm... wat else..? i could go over n sleep over at jakes hse... 
debbie's hse aint bad... but... that comes wit a price... den he spotted someone from across
the street... who else but callie, walking along the road... in her school uniform... "so she studies here...all this while... right behind my school...."

     since den... for the nex three years... scott would always be day dreaming outside the
window... staring rite at the road she always walks to n from school... from the blue student uniform...to her green librarian uniform... all the way till her red prefects uniform... how
predictable...a prefect... he watched her every chance he got... its a wonder how he does that...
he jus feels all uncomfortable n "weird"... he turns around n there she will be...

     there were times when scott wished he din noticed her... when he saw her surrounded by
guys... bugging her n annoying her... thats MY job okay?! especially when there would be water fights or if its raining... callie would be the girl to pick on... with her full white blouse... he would
be so angry n pissed... but he never showed his anger towards her or anywhere near her..
he din wan her to know wat his background was... he din wanna involve her... nor endanger
her in any way ... never...

     there was no place in callie's life to accept scott and his colourfull past... so he din even try...



part iii coming up... like it? post a comment!


     

::was it meant to be? :: part 1 :: how callie met scott

     "no!! he is so totally hot! i'm telling you, i saw him play basketball jus now!FYI... topless!!" 
     "really? that hot...? hmmm...not bad... you actually KNOW him? no way!"    
     "uh huh...yes way! he was from my primary school! we're goin out nex weekend... wanna join?i could... intro u guys....."
     "ohmygosh...really?! gawd i love you!! but i cant this weekend... i hav smthg on... a youth camp..."
     "youth camp?"
     "yea..... from this church i go to..."

     callie was a typical girl next door with great results.... so she gets to transfer to the school she wanted to... but she went there alone... she practically ditched her primary school life, to 
start abrand new one here.... and yes, as you've guessed it.. the boy crazy one is callie.... and 
the gurl she's talking to is her first friend in the new school-amy.... 
and THAT was how callie came across the church's sunday class... because amy was there...

     that sunday, callie put on the "decent clothes?" and went to the church... hoping to mayb
find a friend or two... unfortunately amy forgotten to tell her that the classes wit seperated into chinese n english... and since she was from a chinese school... she was enrolled into the chinese section...-away from amy and friends-

     "beautiful... alone again!!" she thought as she stepped into the class... unfimiliar faces.. she
felt all alone again... "at least theres still boys.." being as boy crazy as she was... she quickly scanned the room... and her eyes landed upon a boy sitting at the end of the class... "hey, he
aint bad.... kinda cute..." she blushes n sat down...

     "hey, you're short!! haha... shortie!!!!"

     callie jumped off her chair, not knowing what hit her... she turned around only to find the
boy she was eye-ing staring at her.... she blushed... "shit! now what?!" she walked up to him... gosh, he's cute! "what?!you think you very tall a? ur not much taller den i am!!" look at those eyes...my gosh, he's hot! she blushed even more....he inched closer to her, lean right up to her.... callie paniked!! she could practically smell him!!! and he smelled good...  ohmygosh ohmygish
ohmygish ohmygosh!! her heart was thumping.. hormones were raging!! whats he gonna do?!

     suddenly, he reached out. and with one big whack, he oushed her head down... AND HE RAN AWAY!!!! "whhhhhaaaaatttttt?????!!!" callie quickly got up and started to chas the annoying boy which her likings are growing thinner by the seconds... "you!!!! STEEEEEEWWWWPPPIIIDDD!!!! idiotic!!! dumbo!!!!! YOUUUUUUU!!! dun you run!!!!! come here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" anyone could hear her screaming as she ran after the boy..... "when i get my hands on you!!! you're sooooooo dead!!!"she ran till she was out of breath.... she was good at memorizing, she was great with books! but running?! ehehhe... even a baby could've crawled faster...

     "dumb *pants*....dumb...... *pants* idiot..... call... me....*pants* short.... stew*pants* pid.... idiot!!" she couldn't run anymore... sitting by the sidewalk, screetching for breath...

     "so..... i guessed you met our class rebel-scott..."

     "scott?!" she turned around and there the teacher was... he passed her a tissue...and he
walked away grinning from eye to eye at his bunch of hyperactive monkeys... "so he has a
name... scott..."


next: hey, scott right? i'm callie...