--- callie,
do take care of yourself coz i no longer can.
wishing you best of luck in your future, scott.---
there it was, a note, sitting right at her table in class. sitting right on
top of it was gastric tablets. he knew. tears began streaming down her
cheeks. he cared. her fingers were trembling and her vision was blurred.
she clentched the note tightly. y din he come? why?
i wanted to tell u so many things. how much i missed u and our long
talks. i noe it wasnt meant to be as we are from different worlds. i noe
it may be too much for me to ask for more den jus frens. i wanted to tell
you tat i stil cared as i did and it'll never change. boyfriends were pushy
and touchy. they were jerks and they din giv a damn accept how to get
into my pants. but u din. i miss you. i go out there hopefull and i failed. i
couldn't find friendship or relationship with the innocence and trust we
had. if we had such chemistry, why isnt it meant to be?!! WHY?!
heartbroken at dissapointed at the world. callie was depressed. was it
really meant to be? they are totally different ppl with totally different
personalities.she was from a world where the most important thing at
tat moment was scoring in exams and being a prefect. while scott grew up
learning to watch his back whenever he's walking. he grew up carrying a
knife in his pocket and a stick stashed in his car. when callie was worried
bout proms and dates, scott was dodging cops. then again, how can they
be so close to each other emotionally when in reality they are worlds
apart?!
-.-.-.-.-.-
everytime she sees scott bandaged, she knew. must be the
fights. how it hurts her to noe. she worried day n night, she prayed so
hard tat he would be fine. for years, even after scott left the mafia. he
was still "involved" some way.
"must u go?" callie would ask. hoping tat he would say no.
"i gotta do this. he's my friend." scott would say. it seemed so
"matter-of-fact". but it is not!
"i tot u quit?!" callie was desperate. she din wan him to go. she
noes wats ahead. he'll come back hurt, bleeding... she could bear it.
she was concerned. wat if something bad happen?! wat if he got
hurt?! please dun go... please... she looked up at scott. silently
begging tat he could stay. somehow scott did understand. he hugged
her tightly.
"i wun get hurt okay? i promised. i jus gotta do tis. please
understand." scott smiled. and he left. he din come back in one piece.
but tat sin stop callie from worrying and pacing around her room
everytime scott pick up a call.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-
there was once scott din appear for sunday class. it was weird as
he always came. callie became curious but she din asked. becoz it
was getting awkward between dem. stuck in between. soon the
teacher came in.
"where's scott? skip class a?" the teacher asked. callie listened
tentively hoping to know wat did happen to him.
"he's in the hosp." scott's sis answered. the teacher was shocked.
so was callie. wat?! why?! wat happen?! so many question began
popping in her mind.
"wat happen o? is he okay?" some students asked.
"he's alright. he was pretty banged up. motorcycle accident." the
class gasped. they were discussing it. everyone. everyone but callie.
she was speechless. she din know was to do. she was stoned. wat
happen?! is he alright? pretty banged up?! wats tat suppose to
mean?! oh god... please let him be alright....
after class she quickly went home. she tried asking her parents if
she could go visit. but her parents were reluctant. growing up as she
did. she abide. she din argue. she jus went back into her room. held
a pillow in her face and started to cry. why? she din know. the tears
jus came. out of fear... out of concerned... out of worries... perhaps...
out of love? she din wan him to be hurt. she weeped n weeped. she
wished she could be there. at least jus to know how was he. but she
couldn't. all i wanted to be was by ur side.
for the nex weeks, scott still din showed up. callie was worried. he
was banged up. its been 2weeks. wats wrong?! everyday she would
linger around her hse phone. she would pick up her phone and dial tat
familiar number. i'll jus call and ask how is he. tat all. but when
someone picked up the phone. she paniked. wat if he din wanna see
me? she hung up.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-
it weird what we have. ppl tell me i deserve better. mayb i do.
which wan do i deserve more? a man with great results, nice family
background, steady life yet with no sparks? or a man tat i cared for
and i still tink he cares for me too? so wat if he doesnt study and he
use to smoke? so wat if he was involved with the mafia? screw dem.
screw it all. wat if all i wanted was him all along? other boyfriends
din work out. i ended up comparing him wit dem. how we can click
and i couldn't wit dem. how he understood me without me saying
a word and they din get me if i drew dem a clear picture.
in around a month, scott did come back. slightly battered up, with
a bandage around his chest. yet he still smiled at her. he still managed
to melt her heart every single time. tats it. i'm gonna ask him. end
this confusion.
"gald to see ur fine." scott turned around. he smiled. he seemed glad.
"hey you.... tot u were talking to me anymore... hehe.." scott replied.
chuckled abit.
"u tot i wasnt talking to u anymore so u drove ur bike up the roof?!"
scott looked shocked at callie's reply. den he laughed.
"guessed the whole world knows huh?" they laughed. den there was
this awkward silence.
"hey, can we talk? " callie asked.
"sure... of course. wat u have in mind? " scott followed callie up to the
curb.
"we can talk bout anything right? i dunno how to ask this. so i'm jus
gonna ask u straight."
"erm... yea... sure..."
"do u like me? i mean "like me" like me...? i keep sensing tat u care. so
do u?" callie was looking at him. straight in his eyes. hoping tat it was true.
tat all this torment was worth it. it was real....
"......... urm... callie, how shud i put this... i do care for u... i really do. but
tats all.... it not wat u think. really... sorry...." he smiled. and he left.
callie jus stood there. she jus stood there. she couldnt feel her legs. she
held on to the nearest wall. she leaned on it. she slided down to the floor.
sorry.....?
part viii....
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