down and up again...

i went to monash tday...
in case you all din noe, i'm finishing my diploma in 5 months time...
and i was planning to go to monash to finish up my degree...

so i prepared everything...my results..my slips....my study syllabus.
EVERYTHING...
and i went to monash...

monash told me that they may not be able to accept me into their programme.
because my diploma is "design" base...
and i was shocked.
coz i was told from the very start that IT IS ACCEPTABLE!!!

my college said i can switch...
the monash ppl during the education fair said so too.
same wit the kdu ppl n inti...
i was told tat i can switch over.

and now i'm slammed in the face with this piece of crap!
if my diploma isnt accepted.
i do not have any other choice but to start all over from foundation...
FOUNDATION!!!
after 2&half years!!

TWO and HALF!!

suddenly feels like shit! wasted.
haih...
i tot choose this course was the right thing..
as in like i had everything planned...
the whole way thru.
now it jus feels so messed up.
i may end up with nthg!
like starting all over again...
goin back to foundation.....

its sucks.

so balik rumah...cried my eyeballs out...
literally flooded the whole hse...

den stared at the four walls + ceiling in my room....

i'm jus sooooo angry...
i'm angry coz WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN!!
i'm angry coz i'm not a bad student!
I'm not lazy or stupid when it comes to my work.
i never got anything less than a B+...
my cgpa is 3.8...
and i'm stuck here...with these options...
!$%^!!!!!!!@#$%!!!!!
if i'm stupid, or dumb or i have screw up bad results...
and u dowan to accept me...
fineee~

after sum time out...thinking of the not-so-bad things...
den ok.... i'm gonna go kdu to ask again nex sat...personally....to comfirm...
and i'm gonna ask inti personally also...mayb the nex week....
i need to know the right facts...
accepted or not...from the counsellors/lecturers themselves.

if they couldn't give me a comfirmed answer, like 100%.
i'll still apply to them after i finish...*cross fingers for last hope*
if it doesnt work out...
fineeeee...i'll start over....

i guess it alright...
not that i regreted taking advertising design...
i learnt alot during this period of time...
done alot of stuff and met alot of ppl...
so i cant say that taking this diploma is entirely WASTED.
even if i had to start over fresh from the bottom....
i'll be a grad with a communication degree + a design diploma...

doesnt seem that bad now when its in that perspective...

truly.
caryn